"Can we keep the Easter Bunny?" and other Bunny funnies

Today is Easter Monday. The day after the big event. Easter is one of our most significant religious holidays and, in the eyes of babes, it's second only to Christmas. The Easter Bunny can't hold a candle to Santa but, the anticipation of what he may bring is enough to wake the tots well before sunrise... and, in our house, literally put the fear of God in them before they tucked into bed.


We spent Saturday night dying Easter eggs and reflecting on what the Bunny might bring, when the Bunny might come and why he might skip over our house if they didn't go upstairs to bed right NOW! With a trio of two year olds, a feisty four year old and a six year old who is at times seriously sensible, the evening provided a few moments worth recalling and sharing.

 For starters, we struggled with the set-up. Since we don't have enough stools at our counter for all five of our kids, we decided we'd put the triplets in their high-chairs for the annual decorating of the eggs. They were extremely excited and for some reason, we just assumed that at the tender age of two, they had a clue about what to do. We assumed they would instinctively know NOT to drink the egg dye. This, as it turns out, was a mistake -- the kind of mistake that fortunately did not require a call to poison control but did require a bit of bleach in the next batch of laundry.


We also assumed they would know NOT to eat their newly decorated hard-boiled eggs. This too was a mistake -- the type of egregious error that resulted in a half dozen pastel colored eggs being consumed rather than gracing their Easter baskets. If only you could have seen their gleeful faces as they smashed their newly dyed eggs on their high chair trays... I've seen that look before and it just might have been on Christmas morning. It was that good.
 

While the "Cubs" smashed and ate their eggs, Liam and Ciara were engaged in some healthy sibling bickering. "That's my egg." "No, it's MINE!" "Mom, why did she get more than me?" "Dad, it's not fair!" And so on. Then Liam asked, "How does the Easter Bunny get in the house? Does he come down the chimney?" I have to say, we were stumped by this one. How does the Easter Bunny get in the house? Does he walk (or hop?) in the front door? Climb through a window?


Well, perhaps not surprisingly, it was this line of speculation that ended up putting the fear of God -- or perhaps more aptly put, the fear of the Easter Bunny -- into all our kids. The notion of a six-foot bunny climbing through their bedroom window or thumpety-thumping on the roof above their heads was enough to send all of them scampering up to bed. It also led them to wonder "Does the Easter Bunny bite?" "Will he come into our room?" "Can we keep the Easter Bunny?" and, of course, from our little fella who "no like Santa", "NO LIKE THE EASTER BUNNY!"


The upside of the bunny hysteria is that unlike most kids six and under, ours slept until 7:30 on Easter morning. And, they were pleasantly surprised to wake up without rabbit bites but rather, to discover baskets brimming with jelly beans and chocolate eggs (the aforementioned hard-boiled ones having been demolished and digested the night before!).
 
Today, it's back to school. The baskets have been picked over, the church clothes are washed and the egg dying outfits now resemble funky new tie-dyes. I've always wished we celebrated Easter Monday here in the States but truly, I think it might have been just too much for the kids to take. Not to mention, if Easter Monday follows Easter Sunday, I'd just be left to explain why Easter Tuesday and Wednesday don't come next. And, well, since I'm still trying to figure out how the Easter bunny gets in the house, I'm done with answering questions. For now, anyway!

From the mouths of babes -- the funny things kids say

When you have five kids and the oldest is only six, you realize that kids say a LOT of funny things. You also realize that as a parent, YOU say a lot of funny things. One of the things I will always remember saying is “Liam, please don’t drive your tractor through the feta cheese”. This is when I knew I had most certainly crossed a line and was most definitely not in Kansas anymore. I thought it might be fun to share with you some of the most silly, absurd, incongruous things that my kids and I have said in just the past few weeks and, invite you to share a few random remarks of your own. I’m sure that you and your tots are just as insane at times as me and mine… I hope you are anyway. If you’re not, it proves that I just might be insane! But, since I am willing to take that risk, here are a few of my recent favorites:

Last week, we took the kids out to celebrate Liam’s good report card. Mind you, Liam is only in first grade but he seems to be on the right track and that seemed to be worth celebrating so, last Thursday we went out to dinner and that event yielded a handful of colorful commentary:

• As we loaded the kids into the car, explaining that we were headed out for a celebratory meal, Ciara whined from the backseat “But what about MEEEEE? Can we also celebrate that I wished upon a star?!” Really, this is true. If only I could get someone to take me out to dinner every time I wished upon a star!
• After he begged, kicked and screamed for chocolate milk, we finally caved in and ordered it for our little man Cormac. Upon delivery, he took one look at it, pushed it away and loudly proclaimed: “NO LIKE IT! This milk is DIRTY!!!”
• When Liam’s plate of mini-burgers and major fries arrived, he gobbled down the burgers and just picked at his fries, prompting me to ask “What’s the matter buddy, you don’t like them”? His response? “I do Mom but don’t you know that fries aren’t good for you?" So much for celebrating!

Last Saturday, we were taking the kid for haircuts and noticed a helicopter hovering overhead. I’d heard on the news that there had been a bank robbery a few towns away and commented that perhaps they were doing an aerial search for the bad guys. This prompted some priceless remarks, including:

• From Ciara: “So Mom, do bad guys usually run on the right side or the left side of the street?”
• From Liam: “I don’t think they usually run, do they Mom? Ciara, I think they will be the guys you see tip-toeing down the street all hunched over. They’ll probably be wearing black tights and masks.” Thank you, classic cartoons, for providing this timeless image of bad guys!
• From the triplets in the third row of the mini-van: “Bad guys! Bad guys! I see bad guys! Over there! Bad guys over there!” I should have known. The pint-sized police are always on high alert!

This weekend prompted a classic. After 36 hours of tripping over Legos, blocks, trains and rocks (yes, the rock collection somehow made it inside!), we’d had it. The “clean up song” has lost its allure, the notion of teamwork wasn’t working and we were at our wits end. Des, who never loses his cool actually yelled at them. He yelled “IF YOU DON’T CLEAN THESE TOYS UP, I AM GETTING A TRASH BAG AND THROWING THEM ALL OUT!” Liam, unable to contain a giggle and a smirk was put on the hot seat. “You think it’s funny?!” , Des asked. “No Dad,” he responded with a grin. “I’m just thinking you’ve never done it before so you’re not going to do it now.”

Yikes. Where is the owner’s manual for these little people when you really need it?! Since I don’t have one, we’re just doing the best we can and trying to laugh as much as possible. If we don’t, I’m quite certain we will in fact go insane. Until then, I’ll keep sharing the crazy things our kids (and we!) say and hope that you will do the same.