Tuesday Tip: Don't Sweat the Small Stuff: Savor it!

One of life's simple pleasures: Puddle Jumping!

I tend to find myself feeling a bit, well, schmoopy, this time of year.   As the seasons change and class picnics and school concerts fill the calendar, I am reminded daily of how fleeting this time with our children is; of how today's hardships provide tomorrow's humor and how, in the blink of an eye, these little ones who needed us move on, move up and move out.  

Ok, technically, with our oldest only seven, I know that no one is moving out any time soon but, I can't help but be struck by the fact that our seven and five year old are pretty much over me.  Sure, they still need me in some ways but, I'm no longer the center of their world.  Whereas they once thought I could do no wrong, they now know that I can and do.  They are smart, independent and savvy.  And that's the way it should be.

On the other hand, our trio of identical three-year olds still worship the ground I walk on.  They still occasionally cry when I go to work and routinely run to the door and jump into my arms when I come home.  They greet me each morning with a smile, filled with anticipation for the day ahead and asking as they rub the sleep from their eyes "Is today a Mommy day?"  Of course, every day is a Mommy day but in their world, a "Mommy Day" is a day I don't work.  Today, we had a "Mommy morning" and it made me realize how important it is not sweat the small stuff, but to embrace it.  Today, instead of yelling at them for jumping in puddles, I joined them.  Instead of stopping them from splashing in the tub, I simply shut the shower curtain and let them have at it.  And you know what?  It was awesome.  Small stuff; little moments; daily routines; shared secrets -- these are the wonders of parenthood.  And, as far as I'm concerned, they are passing by far too quickly. That's why I plan to seize every chance I get to...

• Hold hands
• Jump in puddles
• Look at bugs
• Snuggle and cuddle
• Sing silly songs
• Eat ice cream
• Yell less and smile more

These are the things that make Mommy Days memorable -- and the reasons why it's just not worth it to sweat the small stuff.  In the end, the small stuff will be forgotten, your small ones will be big and we'll realize that little did we know, it was some of these small things that mean the most.  Hopefully, like the day that I took the morning off to splash in puddles!

Home Sweet Home: Preparing to say good-bye to "My First House"

"The Lyons Den"... a.k.a. "Home Sweet Home"

When we first discovered we were going to have triplets, bringing our tally of children to five tykes under four, I was absolutely stunned.  Shocked.  So much so that my initial response was “where we will we live?!”  I couldn’t envision how we’d fit five small children in our tiny three-bedroom house.  Of course, once the reality of the high-risk pregnancy set in, I became far more concerned with their health (and mine!) than our housing logistics.

Fast forward four years.  We are blessed to have five spunky, healthy children aged seven and under.  We survived the arrival of the triplets, many sleep deprived nights and the arrival and departure of baby items that simplified our lives and cluttered our cozy home – for instance, a triple set of bouncy seats, high chairs and pack & plays.  These have been handed down while our tots have been growing up.

Today, our seven-year old “big guy” and five year old “princess” share a room (and a dresser!) and the triplets do too.  As they get bigger, my stoic approach that “each kid only needs one drawer!” is getting harder and harder to hold on to;  you can fit many more onesies and baby clothes in a drawer than you can size 3T pants and shirts!

It is this crowding of the drawers and overcrowding of our house that led us – at long last – to put it on the market.  We’ve always known we needed more space. Over the past few years, we’ve flirted with other homes, longing for their master bedroom suites and spacious playrooms.  We’ve been so bold as to put offers on a few, only to wake up the next day wondering what we had done and scrambling to undo it.  We weren’t ready to make a move.  And now, I suppose, we are.  But the very notion summons up such nostalgia, I’m not sure I’ll ever really be ready to leave this house behind. 

We arrived here seven years ago and it was the perfect “my first house.”  Even so, I hated it.  We moved in on a Friday and I went back to work the next Monday, leaving my 3-month old firstborn son behind as I rode the train to the city.  The city was my home; I knew my way around and was surrounded by friends and family.  It was really difficult for me to make the transition to our bucolic little home in the suburbs but now, seven years and four more children later, I love it.   It’s hard to imagine saying good-bye to this humble abode that has truly become our “Home Sweet Home.”

I relished giving all five of our children bottles on our front porch.  Watching them play in the backyard.  Helping them climb up the stairs, out of their cribs and into my arms.  In the seven years we’ve lived here, our babies have become children and we’ve all grown older and wiser.  It’s time to move on.  But it’s so hard to go.  Especially when I don’t know where the road will lead us.  I can only hope that when we find our next house, it too will quickly become a home as sweet as this.

Silly Nicknames for kids: endearing, damaging or totally insane?

Do you have nicknames for your kids?  We do.  Lots of 'em.  So many that I fear they may be causing some issues with our identical triplet boys.  But, to be fair, let me start at the beginning. 

When Liam, now seven, was born, he was a real snuggle bug.  It was the winter of 2004/5 and during those long, cold, dark months, he spent a lot of time snuggling in and scootching up my shoulder in that way only a newborn can.  You know about schootching, right?  It's that wiggly way babies nuzzle in, up and over your shoulder; it's really quite pleasant to experience, especially when the wind is howling and the temperature is falling.  This sweet baby maneuver earned Liam the nickname of "Scootie" in addition to an original little ditty we'd sing to him that went something like this: "Ooh, ooh, Scootie, ooh Scootie-Loo.  Ooh ooh Scootie.  Ooh Ooh, we love you!"  Sleep deprivation can do strange things to you and this was definitely one of ours.  I'm sure Liam is grateful to have outgrown the Scootie nickname but, the standard was set and his four other siblings are now suffering the consequences. 

For Ciara, it's not that bad.  When she was first born, we called her "Bitsy" because she seemed so itsy-bitsy compared to her big brother Liam, who was almost two at the time.  As the months passed, she turned into "Little Bitsy Burps A Lot" because, well, she burped a lot and it sounded like a cute doll name and she seemed like a cute little doll.  When she started to talk, she couldn't say "Ciara" and it came out like this "Ciaga" -- pronounced like this: "Key-Ga." Somehow, that one stuck.  We all call her Ciaga.  Which has line extensions including: Ciaga-Loo, C.Loo, Lucy Loo, and LuLuLemon.  Don't ask.  It just happened.  Sleep deprivation still reigns supreme. The bad news is that as this five year old hops on the bus and heads to kindergarten, we are waving good-bye to our sweet Ciaga-Loo.  The good news is that the kids at school all call her Ciara; she can say it, spell it and knows without a shadow of a doubt that Mom and Dad's silly nicknames stay at home.

Unfortunately, the same can not be said of our identical triplets who, at three years old seem to already have some identity issues brewing.  We consistently dress Kevin, Declan and Cormac in red, blue and green to help folks tell them apart; this backfired rather dramatically when Declan started to tell people his name is "Blue" .  You would think given the challenges that these guys face, walking around town with identical little faces, we would stay true to the names we gave them.  But alas, that is not the case.  I find nicknames just too irresistible and as such, Kevin has become KooKoo Bear, Declan is Duckling and Cormac is MacMac.  But wait, it doesn't end there, there's more!  

For Kevin, KooKoo Bear has several iterations, our favorite of which includes pretending to page him, like those announcements you hear in the airport.  "Mr. Bear?  Is there a Mr. Koo Koo Bear in the house?"  He thinks it's hilarious and so do we.  Our little Duckling (formerly known as "Blue") tends to take things relatively in stride, including the occasions when we quack at him, assuming that he must speak Duck. For the record, he does not and seems to find our antics and quacking less amusing by the day.  Last but not least, there is MacMac.  He was born last and came into the world as "Baby Mac."  Not to be outdone by his identical siblings, he was a chow hound from day one and clearly committed to becoming "Big Mac" on the fast track... which of course led us to all sorts of fun including the occasional "Mac Snack Attack", "Mac & Cheese" and the final grand evolution to "Macaroni" which, of course, culminated in our admittedly absurd paging game: "Mr. Roni?  Is there a Mr. Mac A. Roni in the house?"

Is it sleep deprivation? Are we insane? Do all parents have numerous strange nicknames for their kids?  I don't know.  All I know is that yesterday, Kevin came home from preschool with some “artwork” that said "KooKoo" on the back.  Apparently the teacher tried to write "Kevin" and he indignantly insisted "my name is NOT Kevin.  I am Koo Koo Bear!"  Um, Houston, I think we have a problem.  I hope it's one he outgrows.  But if not, I beg you not to make fun of my Koo Koo Bear.  If you do, prepare for the wrath of his loyal back-up unit because if there's one thing I can say about Scootie, Ciaga, Duckling and MacMac and KooKoo, it's that they stick up for each other... which, I suppose, is at least one thing we’ve gotten right in this hazardous, sleep deprived world of parenting!

The Triplets Turn Three

Last week I took our trio of identical tots for their three year old physical.  It's stunning to me that three years have flown by so fast and that my babies are no longer babies.  When they ask with sincere hope and anticipation "is me big yet?!", I have to admit that yes, much to my dismay, they are.

My little guys are no longer the little peanuts they once were -- not that they were ever unusually small; they were born at quite a healthy weight for triplets... which resulted in a not so healthy weight for me!  In any case, when I reflect on the past three years, it's truly a blur.  I remember bits here and there -- moments and memories that have collected in a vivid slideshow in my mind...

It begins with a surreal appearance on The Early Show followed by paparazzi snapping our pictures when we left the hospital.  After that it's a whirlwind that includes...

• Neighbors and friends welcoming us home with outstretched arms and months of meals
• The feeling of despair the first time I had to change three tiny diapers, got peed on three times and wondered how we'd ever survive the first few years
• The feeling of defeat when I got bronchitis, pumped green breast milk and ultimately had to retire the pump... and the breasts
• The awesome sight of three tiny rumps up in the air as they sweetly snoozed in their cribs
• The feeling I could conquer the world the first time I slept for six hours straight 
• The feeling that the world would conquer me after months of sleep deprivation (I still sometimes feel this way!)
• The amazement of finding three little fellas sitting/standing/singing/bouncing in their cribs
• The fear of the day they leave those cribs behind -- as our six year old put it: "that will be a total disaster Mom"
• The joy of having one, two, three little boys jump with joy and into my arms when I get home from work
• The angst of having one, two, three little boys throwing up in the middle of the night
• The sense of accomplishment the first time we left the house in the stroller, the minivan, the wagon, and then finally, on foot
• The mental checklist of diaper bag requirements - bottles, sippy cups, diapers, wipes, snacks and so on!
• The written checklist for weekends away, when we carted pack and plays, high chairs and strollers without batting an eye
• The black eye that they got one by one while learning to walk
• The perils of the tub, the pool and the beach when water was our worst enemy as we juggled three slippery tots
• The struggle of wrestling three wiggly tykes into snowsuits and snow boots; 
• The wonder of hearing them talk to each other in a secret language only they can understand
• The wonder that they are here at all.  Happy, healthy and truly against the odds.

People talk about how hard it is to have a newborn, and indeed it is.  They also talk about the terrible twos, which in my experience have been closer to terrific.  They talk about time flying by too fast and while it's a cliche, it's true. I wouldn't want to go all the way back to the days of leaky boobs and sleepless nights but I sure wouldn't mind the nuzzle of a newborn snuggled up against me.  Since that won't be happening, I will instead snuggle in with my three year olds while treasuring the time we have together and the days ahead... days that I'm sure will still be a bit of a busy blur but, like the past three years, will include moments and memories that will never fade.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        

Tuesday Tip: Mama Mia and other discipline tactics for tots

With so many tots toddling around my house, I’m constantly asked “how do you do it?”   I suspect the truth is that we don’t do things all that differently from other folks; in our house, discipline and routine reign supreme.  Here are our Top 5 tactics for maintaining a semblance of sanity when things get insane:

1.     Anticipate:  Like most things in life, anticipation goes a long way toward prevention.  This holds especially true when it comes to tiny tykes who are prone to melt down when they are tired, hungry, overwhelmed or all of the above.  Since I also tend to melt down under these circumstances, my solution is to plan accordingly and be prepared – much like the good Girl Scout I was back in the day.  Pack snacks, plan outings around naptime and know your limits. As long as you’re ready for whatever the day (and quite possibly your kids) throw your way, you can anticipate yelling less and enjoying more.

2.     Be Calm:  I’ve learned the hard way that your tone sets the tone.  I’ve tried to outshout five titans having tantrums more times than I care to count and have yet to win.  When the times get tough, I try to channel my daughter Ciara’s kindergarten teacher; she is the ultimate champion of 5-year olds.  When chaos prevails, she uses a quiet, sing-songy voice.  “Stop, look and listen,” she sweetly croons and much like a mystical snake charmer, she regains control of the classroom.  It doesn’t always work in our house but it does tend to diffuse the situation, allowing us to regain the upper hand we regret having lost in that failed shouting match!

3.     Consistency is King:  We have a rule in our house -- we make one dinner and one dinner only.  Despite the kids asking if I’m a waiter (yes, this has happened), they know with certainty that I am not a short order cook.  If pressed, they would likely say I’m not much of a cook at all but that’s not the point – the point is consistency.  What are kids if not little soldiers in training? They desperately want to be good little soldiers and it’s our job to show them how.  Consistency is one good way to do it.  Kids like to know where they stand and what the boundaries are.  Unlike soldiers however, they will continually push the limits.  Alas, that is part of their job as a kid.  Just as part of your job as a parent is to bring them back in line.  Consistently!

4.     Diversion:  It probably won’t come as a surprise that most kids have a very short attention span.  We often find ourselves frustrated by this but in times of trouble, this is one tiny tot trait that you can – and should – take advantage of!  In our house, we can calm most storms by simply changing the subject. Or game. Or room.  A Lyons Den Peace Treaty – or at the very least a truce – can be easily achieved just by blasting the stereo.  My husband is somewhat humiliated by this but, if our three-year old triplets are fighting over a truck or the “big kids” (now five and six) are arguing about who has more Legos, all I have to do is blast Dancing Queen or Mama Mia.  Before you can say ABBA, our war-torn living room is transformed into a Solid Gold dance-a-thon.  Mission accomplished!

5.     Exhale:  Just do it.  Take a really big, deep breath and then let it all out.  Maybe do it again.  Perhaps a third time.  You will feel better. If your kids are at all like mine, you may need to lock yourself in the bathroom just to take those three big breaths but, you’ll be glad you did.  It will allow you the presence of mind to see that no matter how out-of-control things may seem in any given moment, it is just that, a moment.  And when your tots have toddled off to school and you’re wondering how the time went by so quickly, I’m quite sure these won’t be the moments you remember. 

"I'm Blue": a major mishap of raising identical triplets

There are a few phrases I never expected to hear in this lifetime, among them "You're having triplets" and "They're identical."  Given that I had two toddlers at home when I received this news, it was especially unsettling... and all the more so when the disturbing facts and frightening statistics about birth defects and premature labor finally settled in.

The pregnancy was a long haul -- 36 weeks of ups and downs, worrying and fretting, and sleepless nights with an alarmingly large belly, as noted for posterity here:

Freakishly large belly with 17+ lbs. of bouncing baby boys inside

When the little fellas finally arrived, we had a plan for telling them apart.  While my husband Des wanted to tattoo them, I decided that just a bit of nail polish on the big toe would be a better way to go -- red for Kevin, blue for Declan and green for Cormac.  For the better part of their first two years, these little guys had a better pedicure than I ever did... typically with a coordinating outfit to eliminate any possibility of a mix-up.

Onesies with their names helped in the beginning... could you tell these guys apart?!

As time passed, we all comfortably relied on the color coding system.  It has helped me and Des, Liam and Ciara, my parents, neighbors and friends and extended family to know who's who here in the Lyons Den.

Color-coded kids from the very beginning -- circa May 2009

That said, I'm not so sure it has helped the very fellas it was intended to benefit: Kevin, Declan and Cormac.  Since the day they were born, these poor guys have had their toe nails painted and their hand-me-downs organized by color.  When we don't have red, Kevin may get orange or yellow.  When we don't have green, Cormac may get gray or white.  But we never seem to run out of blue... which I suppose is why when strangers ask Declan what his name is, he responds with great sincerity "I'm blue."  

Yikes, now is that a motherhood mishap, or what?  The poor kid thinks his name is Blue!  Not to worry, this is an issue we're actively working to address, first and foremost by letting them each choose their own clothes.  The problem?  Now they all want blue.  To make matters even more challenging, on many days they all want "Yankee uniforms" and Declan (a.k.a. "Blue") now mutters to himself as he stumbles down the hall "Derek Jeter!  Derek Jeter!"  I suppose in terms of aspirations, it's better to be Jeter than be Blue but, my hope is that one day, he'll be happy just being Declan... and until then, I hope that we -- and everyone else -- will find a way to tell who's who!

Cranky Yankees circa June 2010 in color coded crocs & clearly not too happy about it!

The Summer I did hard time... Potty time

When I look back on the summer of 2011, many memories will be of the hard time I spent in potty time -- "tile time" as my good friend Jill calls it.  Call it what you will, it's hard and it's not fun.  Don't get me wrong, I know it's time well spent; the last thing I want to be is the mom of triplets who go to college in diapers but really, since that's unlikely (both the diaper part and the ability to pay for college!), I can't help but lament the hours I've spent in bathrooms this summer. 

I've spent so much time in our bathrooms at home (no, we don't have three of them, only 1.5!) that I think there's now a dent in the "big potty" seats I've spent hours perched upon.  I've spent so much time in restaurant bathrooms, that I think I've lost a few pounds  -- admittedly, this is the potential upside to being held hostage in a public bathroom by three two-year tyrants waving their willies everywhere but IN the actual potty!  I've spent many a sunny afternoon in the bat-cave like bathrooms you're prone to find at pools and beaches; again, eager to find the bright side (in this case, literally) I suppose I should be grateful for less of those damaging rays and subsequent wrinkles.  I've also spent a fair amount of time in the bathroom at church which, on the one hand, gives new meaning to "praying to the porcelain God" but, hasn't done much for my spirituality... other than, of course, repeated prayers that Kevin, Declan and Cormac finally get the swing of it (for lack of a better term!) so we can put these potty-training days behind us.

Truthfully, it's getting old.  And I'm out of PullUps.  And I'm loathe to buy more.  My little guys really seem to be getting it.  Or so it seems until I find a turd on a chair (as I did during dinner one night this week) or sail across their bedroom on a pool of pee on the floor (as I did this evening).  One step forward, two steps back.  I suppose that's how it goes.  Try, try again.  As much as I want this phase to be behind me, I also have a keen appreciation for the fact that when it's gone, it's gone.  Much like the bottles and onesies and highchairs, diapers and pull-ups will soon be gone.  Already, my sweet babes look like big boys as their shorts sag behind them in the space the diapers once filled but "training pants" don't.  By the way, has anyone else experienced these training pants?  If not, don't bother -- if they worked, I wouldn't have experienced a Slip n' Slide of pee earlier tonight!

In any case, I know that this too shall pass. And when it does, I will be proud of my guys for figuring it out.  And I will be glad that my house no longer smells like a urinal. And I will be just a little sad about those saggy shorts for I know they represent the next phase and I'm not 100% convinced that I'm ready for my babies to become "big boys".

Gripes & Grins: an honest account of raising identical triplets... and 2 more

People have a lot to say about motherhood, especially when you're the Mom of five kids six and under, including identical triplets.   The commentary I receive runs the gamut from the obvious (“Are they triplets?!”) to the intrusive (“Was it IVF?”) to the complimentary (“You deserve a LOT of credit!”).  My responses tend to be "Yes" (even though I'd sometimes prefer to say "No, they're cute clones I got on sale at Target!"), "No" (although really it's none of your business!), and "Why?"  Why do I deserve any more credit than any other Mom?  Did I miss the memo where I had a choice to opt out of fulfilling the basic needs of our children?  I don’t think so. Actually, I think I'm just like most Moms in that I try my best every day and will candidly admit that some days are better than others!

Since I am often asked, I always tell people that the trials we face as parents are universal, as are the triumphs.  Whether you have one kid or five of them, you will inevitably be faced with the challenges of sleep deprivation, potty training and discipline and the rewards of those first steps, wet kisses and joyful leaps off the school bus at the end of the day.  There are general life experiences that unite us as parents yet as the years pass with our identical little boys, (who are now 2 ½), I can’t help but notice that there are a few things that actually do set us here at the Lyons Den apart from the rest of the herd.

For starters, there’s the undeniable fact that wherever we go, we always seem to draw a crowd; people are fascinated by our identical little fellas and delighted to ooh and aah over them as they pass by.  For a while, this was a neat little ego-boost; I couldn't help but get slightly caught up in the wonder and remarkable cuteness of these little people we created and thus far, seem to be successfully nurturing.  Yay us!  More recently however, the thrill has started to fade. Since it's rare that I'm out with only the triplets, I am increasingly sensitive to the impact the triplet adoration has on Liam and Ciara. They are often overlooked; at only six and four years old, the big brother and sister get very little of the glory although, they deserve a lot.

Liam and Ciara inherited a lot of responsibility and high expectations when Kevin, Declan and Cormac were born.  Ciara turned two just a few days before they arrived and Liam was not yet four; both were charged with holding bottles, fetching diapers and setting a good example from that day forward.  Though they are truly remarkable kids in their own right, they often go unnoticed while the adoring public fawns over their little brothers.  Truthfully, Liam and Ciara deserve medals for essentially serving as baby nurses for the past two years and I need to try harder to remember that it's not easy to have inherited a trio of identical tots to follow in your footsteps; this is one of my unique challenges as a parent.

Another unique challenge is specific to Kevin, Declan and Cormac.  Though they look exactly alike, I have to constantly remind myself (and others!) that they are not actually three of a kind but three individuals with their own personalities, preferences and, for better or worse, their own primary colors so everyone knows who’s who.  Kevin is “red”, Declan is “blue” and Cormac is “green”.  This color-coding system seemed like a really good way for family, friends and neighbors (and yes, even us in the beginning!) to tell them apart… unfortunately, since Declan has begun to introduce himself to folks as “Blue”, I think this clever tool has backfired but, once again, I was just trying my best.

I suppose that's the universal theme here.  As a new day and new week begins, I know will once again try my best.  I also know that there will be good days and bad days and highs and lows. I know I'll regret the mistakes I'll inevitably make (like last night, when I lost it after Declan peed in Liam's Croc!) and I'll relish the little moments that later turn into major memories (like yesterday morning, when we had them ALL in the tub, basking in bubbles and brimming with grins.)  While there are undoubtedly unique circumstances in raising all of our little "Cubs", we're really just like everyone else in that more often than not, we're just trying to make it through the day and make the most of it! 

Busy week = less words & more video!

Every once in a while I decide to entertain myself -- and hopefully you -- by writing to the tune of a well-known little ditty.  In that spirit, I share with you the following and encourage you to read with the tune of "Oh where, oh where has my little dog gone?" running through your head.

Oh where, oh where has this busy Mom gone?
Oh where, oh where can she be?
A week has past since she posted last,
Oh where oh where can she be?!


To Chicago and back,
New York City as well,
She's oh so tired, looks and feels like hell,
Kids wonder, where can Mom be?!

To amuse you all when my writing does cease
There's new video here for you,
See the nav bar above and widget to right
Great HerChannel videos here morning and night!

Now I can't help but wonder where do the years go?
Oh where, oh where can they be?  
Here's a clip from back then and one from last week,
Hope they amuse you as much as they did me!

Five Hungry Little Caterpillars

Since having five kids is an anomaly these days and having identical triplets is literally a long shot, I am the recipient of a lot of unsolicited questioning and commentary.  From “How do you do it?” to “You must be EXHAUSTED!” and even “How DID you DO it?!”, I’ve heard it all.  An increasingly common remark is “You just wait; they are going to eat you out of house and home!” 

I just assumed this comment referred to when our "Cubs" will be teenagers; in addition to worrying about five kids learning to drive, rebelling against me and applying to college, I now have to worry about simply keeping enough food in the house!  Here’s the deal though – it turns out that the food issue has arrived early.  With a trio of two year olds, a feisty four year old and super-charged six year old, I can’t keep groceries (or diapers, for that matter!) in the house despite my weekly deliveries from Stop & Shop and Fresh Direct which are supplemented with monthly hauls from Costco and Trader Joe’s.  Every now and then, there’s a 48 hour window where I feel fairly smug and think I’ve adequately stocked the shelves.  The basement fridge will be full of milk, the cabinets brimming over with cereal, pasta and snacks and the fruit bowls full of fresh bounty.  Then, like some sort of fairy tale twist, BLINK! It’s all gone.

It struck me recently that dinner time (or breakfast or lunch!) in the Lyons Den closely resembles the story of a family favorite, The Very Hungry Caterpillar.  Here’s a recap of dinner one night this week…

 I came home from work (not quite by the light of the moon)  to find not one, but five very hungry little Lyons Cubs waiting to be fed.  Since Des was working late, I opted for a quick kid-friendly meal. 

• I served up THREE boxes of Mac n’ Cheese and ONE big bunch of broccoli, but they were still hungry…
• So I gave them each a large glass of milk and ONE empty half gallon later, they were still hungry…
• So I cut up, not one, not two, but THREE apples.  And they were still hungry…
• So I peeled TWO oranges… and they were STILL hungry!
• So I cut up FOUR kiwis… and they were still hungry!

In an effort to preserve what little food was left in the house, I drew the line and ended dinner before they ate their way through one lollipop, one piece of cherry pie, one sausage, one cupcake and so on.  Even so, much like the very hungry caterpillar in the story, one of my little Cubs was up at 4AM with a tummy ache.  And much like that famously hungry caterpillar, my little Cubs are no longer well, “little”.  They are bigger by the day and there’s an excellent chance that the princess among them fully expects to wake up one day to discover that she is a beautiful butterfly... as she well may be.

As for me, well, I’m considering buying stock in my favorite grocery stores, planting a vegetable garden, an apple orchard and possibly buying a cow – how else can I ensure that we’ll be able to feed these kids when they hit the double digits?!  Any ideas, let me know.  I’m all ears.  And, very accustomed to random remarks, suggestions and advice… at least this time, it is solicited!

Eight is Enough!

It all started out simply enough.  Let’s have a baby.  And so we did.  Two years later we thought, well, this is fun, let’s have another one.  And so we did.  Two years later we thought, well, this is fun, let’s have another one.  And then we got three more.  And then, with five kids under five in the house, well, let’s just say we cooled our jets for a bit.  Apparently, not long enough.

Here’s the deal.  They say that as you get older, the odds of having twins or triplets increases.  They also say that once you’ve had twins or triplets, the odds of having them again increases substantially.  In our case, they said that the odds of identical triplets are about one in a hundred million.  I wonder what they will say when they find out I’m pregnant again.  With triplets.  Yikes, right?!

Well, clearly I’m not getting any younger so, I (we?!) should have known that the odds of a “singleton” weren’t in our favor.  Even so, I have to admit, it’s a bit jarring.  Eight kids?!  Seriously?!  Wow.  This was not part of my master plan.  Frankly, five kids wasn’t part of my master plan.  I suppose I should have learned with our first set of triplets that I am clearly no longer on MY master plan.  I feel like lightening has struck twice.  Seriously, how could I possibly have ended up naturally preggo with triplets not once, but twice?!  What pray tell will we drive?!  A school bus?! 

With the notion of eight kids under seven looming ever closer, I have to admit that I’m at my wits end.  The formula and diapers alone will cause yet another financial setback – to say nothing of where we’ll put these little people, the pending sleep deprivation and the challenging physical transformation that my poor bod is about to endure.  Again. 

I wouldn’t have thought it possible.  And indeed, neither should you.  Ha!  Gotcha!  APRIL FOOLS!  Believe me, five is enough… for now and forever.  :)